i thought i'd cry buckets again when i see grandpa's body, but i didn't. maybe i'd tired myself out from crying earlier in the day. maybe i went into task mode, at the prospect of relatives streaming in.
grandpa looks weird after the embalment and make-up. first time i see him in a suit. his face's tilted to the right, cuz of the position he was in when he died, and the muscles stiffened as a result. weird to look at his body, knowing he's having the time of his life in Heaven.
found a slip of paper with his handwriting in his bible (placed in his coffin). kept it, especially after reading the words. my guess is that he wrote it in the early years of his dementia, when the biggest threat to his health was decreased mobility and strength. his handwriting betrayed that too-it lacked the strength of his usual firm strokes. but the content made me realize that he probably knew his health would lead to a long journey. I shall attempt to translate it from mandarin:
"I know who holds the future, I know God holds my hand. In Him nothing is coincidental; it is all by His grace. In all that I will come to face, regardless of its magnitude, I will trust the omnipotent God; I entrust my all to Him. "
i suddenly wish i had been more receptive to God then. it would have been so interesting to talk to grandpa about Him.
i'm thankful i found this little treasure, in the form of a yellow pages note. i'll remember his rare but beautiful grin when something really tickled him. the times he brought me to the playground, followed me to school in the first weeks of Pri.1, teaching me to cycle and swim, tutoring me in mandarin and mental sums, the way he loved and treasured me; these i cherish so much.
i hope there're bicycles in Heaven; grandpa liked to cycle...
No comments:
Post a Comment